The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
