How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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