we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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