I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize