I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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