the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
