I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
