Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
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She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize