YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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