i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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