3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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