he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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