Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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