This girl is more easily done than said...
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize