garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i can't believe i had my finger in that
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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