His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
