shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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