Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Sext me about skeletons
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
