Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I think im going to throw up on grandma
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
