I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
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I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
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Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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