I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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