She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
she looked like the before picture.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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