she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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