I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
