I molested 6 butterflies tonight
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize