Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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