I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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