$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
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