david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
