the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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