Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
