you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize