You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
