If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
