I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
