How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
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