Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
that may or may not have been my penis.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
