Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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