But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
