My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
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Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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