If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
