i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
