my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
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