GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
