You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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