He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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