Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
