There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
