**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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