seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
