I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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